


Break

by Akiko_Natsuko



Series: Reaper76 [29]
Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Forgiveness, Love, M/M, Safewords, Spanking, Trust
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-19
Updated: 2018-10-19
Packaged: 2019-07-30 01:08:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,295
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16276061
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Akiko_Natsuko/pseuds/Akiko_Natsuko
Summary: Jack is constantly in the public eye, constantly having to live up to the demands of the public, Overwatch and the UN and sometimes it's just too much...sometimes he just needs to break, to forget who he is...sometimes he needs Gabriel to tear him apart, to see the weakness behind the mask.





	Break

  Gabriel had known that the breaking point was coming for nearly a week now, he could see the strain in Jack’s face growing by the day, the darkness behind the pretty boy smile that he gave the rest of the world and the tension layered behind each word. He doubted that anyone else had noticed even though the blond spent nearly every day in the limelight since his promotion to Strike Commander, and even if they had noticed, he doubted they would understand, or know what it was that Jack needed. But Gabriel knew and so he plotted and planned, calling in half a dozen favours to make sure that both of their calendars were clear for the weekend and that they wouldn’t be disturbed for anything less than a major emergency. He’d had to enlist Ana for that bit, because she was the only one he trusted outside of the two of them to know what was really classed as an emergency.

   She must’ve known that something was wrong, because not only had she agreed without question but she was waiting outside Jack’s office when he arrived to collect the blond, leaning against the wall and watching his approach with a worryingly knowing look. For a moment, he contemplated just ignoring her, but he had learned the hard way that never ended well for him and so with a sigh he came to a halt and stared at her silently, daring her to initiate the conversation.

“Don’t give me that look Gabriel Reyes.” Ana was probably the only one on the base who could get away with addressing him in that tone, half motherly scolding and half sarcastic, and he swallowed back the urge to retort as he caught her fingers lingering close to her sleep gun. It wasn’t an empty threat, and he had plans and sleeping wasn’t part of that.

“What do you want Amari?”

“Jack,” she said, tone immediately softening as she tilted her head towards the office, all traces of humour disappearing from her expression. “This job is killing him.”

“I know that.” _Why do you think I’m here?_

“Do you?” Ana asked, and there’s something in her voice that stops him from snapping that of course he realises what the job is doing to Jack. that he’s been watching it happen right in front of his eyes. Instead he scowls, fidgeting uneasily, because there is pain in her expression that he hasn’t seen for a while and he doesn’t know what to say. Thankfully that doesn’t seem to be a problem for Ana as she pushes herself away from the wall, stepping across to him and staring up at him, searching his face for something and he has no idea whether she’s found it or not as she just sighs before glancing back at the office door. “I know things have been tense between you since he got the promotion, and I want to know that this plan of yours isn’t going to be affected by that.” She holds up a hand to stall him, holding his gaze as she adds softly, almost as though afraid the words would carry and do the job for them “It would break him Gabriel…”

   He sighs at that, painfully aware of just how true those words are. Before the promotion came between them he had known Jack just as well as he knew himself, he knew what made the blond tick, what could get under his skin and what could push him to the edge of falling apart, Just as he knew that Jack was currently teetering on the edge and that with a single word he could push him over the precipice. There had been times, in the dark hours of the night when his thoughts refused to let him sleep that he had considered it, considered showing the world the weakness that was hidden beneath the confident mask, revealing the lie that was Overwatch’s Poster boy. But when it came down to it, he knew that he could never do it, because it was Jack, and no matter how much had changed between them he still loved the idiot.

“I’m not going to break him,” he replies finally, voice soft but steady and he holds her gaze without hesitation, letting his guard down for a moment so that she can see the truth behind his words and finally she gives a nod and steps aside.

“Nothing short of another Omnic Crisis will disturb you this weekend,” she promises with a rare half-smile, she reaches out and grips his arm for a moment, a show of camaraderie that he is stunned to realise that he’s missed. “Take care of him Gabriel.”

   He stays where he is until she is out of sight, not liking the complicated mess of emotions in his chest, and it takes him a couple of minutes of breathing deeply before he feels calm enough to move forward and knock sharply on the door, carefully not looking at the nameplate on the door. His knock is greeted with a quiet voice, and he frowns, disturbed. Jack was never meant to sound that subdued, and it occurs to him that maybe he’s underestimated just how close to the edge the blond is even as he stepped inside. The wild blue eyes that meet his gaze confirm that fear, and for a moment he stands frozen, unable to tear his gaze away from the blond. Jack looks wrecked, and it occurs to him as he studies the other man that he must’ve been using something to conceal the dark circles beneath his eyes until now, because surely someone would have noticed otherwise.

_How did I miss this?_

“Jack…” The word slips out and he finds himself across the room, circling the large desk and its terrifying pile of paperwork to reach the blond and his hand is trembling a little as he reaches out to brush his fingers against Jack’s cheeks, feeling the stubble growing and frowning. _He’s slipping_ … Jack had been one of the vainest people that Gabriel had ever met, and since he had been promoted he had never let himself look less than pristine. Jack was watching him now, desperation in the shadowed eyes, but it looked like he lacks the energy or willpower to do anything, and any anger that Gabriel might still have been harbouring vanishes just like that, because this isn’t his Jack and it scares him. “Jackie, it’s time to go home.”

“But…”

“Jack,” Gabriel inserts just the right amount of command into his voice, cutting off the protest before its fully formed because he knows it’s not Jack speaking, but rather the job and right now Gabriel would willingly tear this office and the job it represents apart. Because it’s done this, it’s pushed Jack to the point of falling apart and he hates it, loathes it just as much as he had been coveting it. It’s a relief when Jack immediately falls silent, the shadows in his eyes lightening for a moment as his lips twitch into a weary, relieved smile and he doesn’t resist when Gabriel moves to help him up out of the chair. Once he’s upright Gabriel is right there in his personal space, pulling him into a soft kiss, not caring that they’re technically still on duty or that they could be disturbed. Jack needs it, and right now so does Gabriel and he feels himself relax slightly when Jack responds, leaning against him, and deepening the kiss although it remains slow and unhurried, neither of them needing passion right now.

   When they separate Jack suddenly hugs him, burying his face into Gabriel’s shoulder, fingers coming up to clutch at his back and Gabriel is quick to return the embrace. Hating and loving the fact that it feels like coming home, because there had been a time when this was simply how things were, and the fact that it seems so new and reassuring is a stark reminder of how much they’d been starting to lose. “I’ve missed you Jack…” The words are out before he can stop them, and he feels Jack tense for a minute, but then the fingers against his back clench.

“Me too...”

**

   It’s nearly an hour later that Gabriel guides Jack into their old quarters, feeling a pang at the sight of their belongings intermingled and scattered across nearly every surface. How long has it been since they’ve both been in here? Jack seems to spend half of his time sleeping in his office, and the other crashing in a small room a few doors from it and Gabriel knows he’s just as bad, sleeping on his desk in the Blackwatch office or out on missions. No, if he’s honest he was worse, because he chose to stay away, acting out to try and hurt his partner, just because of a job that he’s coming to realise neither of them are meant for. He growls, guilt stirring again, but he pushes it aside when he turns to see that Jack is stood in the middle of the room, staring around with dull eyes.

“Come on,” Gabriel is gentle, voice soft in a way that he will never let be for anyone else. Not even little Fareeha or McCree get to hear this tone and it works, because a hint of light seep into Jack’s eyes even as he lets Gabriel guide him across to the bed, not protesting as he’s pushed down to sit on the end of it, blinking when the older man crouches down in front of him. “Are you with me?”

“Gabe…” It’s barely a whisper, but it’s warm and it settles deep in his chest and he smiles up at Jack, reaching up to ghost his fingers over a pale cheek. Part of him just wants to curl up with Jack and make sure he rests, but the strain is still there, the darkness in the eyes and he knows that Jack needs more before he can rest. “Gabe…” There’s raw desperation in his voice this time, and Gabriel lets his fingers make contact, waiting for Jack to meet his gaze.

“Jackie,” he murmurs, the familiar nickname warm on his tongue and he can feel Jack melting at it, smiling when the blond finally leans into his touch with a questioning noise. “Tell me what you need.” He knew exactly what Jack wanted, he always did, but he wanted to hear it from the blond, wanted to know his limits, because if a simple thing like a hug could feel so alien, then he didn’t want to imagine what else might have changed and what might go wrong if he didn’t take that into account.

_It would break him…_

“I…” Jack glances away, but Gabriel doesn’t push the issue because he can tell that he is thinking about it. Considering his limit, thinking about what he needs and what he wants and he’s not about to interrupt that, instead taking the time to calm himself, startled to realise just how much he needs this as well. That he needs to reconnect to his Jack, not the man he had been allowing himself to see for far too long. He’s so focused on that thought that he jumps when Jack’s hand comes up to rest against the one still touching his face, and he smiles encouragingly when he sees that the blond is still hesitating. “I want to lose myself…” The words tiptoe out, a hint of shame in them that had never been present before and Gabriel aches to hear it. Pain blossoming at the thought that between them, he and the job have made Jack like this, and he hums encouragingly, urging Jack to continue. “Beat it out of me…give me your worst, as hard as you can…just so I can forget for a while.”

   It’s something they’ve done before so Gabriel’s not worried about that, but he can’t forget that their circumstances are different now and he hates it, but he has to ask.

“What about your meetings?” He doesn’t want to care about that, not when Jack is staring at him with pleading eyes, but if he goes as hard as Jack wants, as he needs, then sitting on a chair is going to be uncomfortable at least. In the past, they had always timed their ‘fun’ for when they had a few days off and he’s not sure the weekend is going to be enough.

“I don’t care…” Jack hisses, his free hand reaching out to clutch lightly at the front of Gabriel’s clothes, fingers twisting into the material as he pleads. “Please…please…” He shakes his head, unable to put into words the storm rising in his chest, but it’s enough and Gabriel nods, leaning up to kiss him softly.

“Shh Jackie, I’ll take care of you,” he assures him when they pull apart, and Jack looks ready to cry just at those words, but he manages to gather himself enough to nod, lips quirking up in a weak smile. “Get changed,” he orders softly, rising and moving back so that Jack can move.

“Gabe…I…”

“It’s okay,” Gabriel cuts him off, already guessing what he’s about to say from the apologetic tone and he’s not surprised. “Wear a t-shirt or something, I won’t do more than you want.” To be honest he’s relieved, they’re both too close to the edge for sex tonight and he wants to talk before they get to that stage, but right now Jack needs something to relieve the pressure and Gabe needs to take care of him and that’s more than enough. Jack’s smile is warmer this time as he nods, rising slowly to his feet, already fumbling with his uniform as he heads for the wardrobe.

   Gabriel watches him for a moment, losing himself of memories of numerous nights watching Jack change for bed, thinking about the teasing stripteases that the blond would occasionally reward him with, and a soft smile tugs at his lips as he catches Jack peeping over his shoulder at him…he always did know when Gabriel was watching him. Taking a deep breath he began to strip out of his own uniform, neatly piling the body armour by the door just in case there is an emergency… there better not be, because he can’t promise that he won’t tear Overwatch apart if it disturbs them this weekend, but he keeps that thought to himself as he moves across to the wardrobe as well, irritation fading as he realises that Jack is in the process of pulling on one of his t-shirts, but not commenting as he reaches past him for a pair of pyjama bottoms.

   Jack is ready first and pads across to the bed, staring down at it with a lost expression that makes Gabriel’s mouth go dry and he immediately goes to him, drawing him into a hug from behind, resting his head on Jack’s shoulder.

“Are you okay?” Jack goes to nod, only to abort the movement and shake his head instead and Gabriel nods, understanding and unsurprised, dipping his head to press kisses to the small sliver of skin showing where the t-shirt has slipped to the side. “Silly question.” They wouldn’t be here if he was okay and isn’t that a bloody painful thought. He grimaces, arms tightening around Jack for a moment before he releases him, stepping around him and climbing onto the bed. Jack has asked for his worst, but he has a feeling that’s not quite what he needs and so he makes himself comfortable against the bedrest before beckoning to the blond who is still hovering by the end of the bed. “Come here.”

   Jack’s movements are slow and hesitant as he obeys, and Gabriel feels a flicker of anger at the sight, not towards Jack, but towards himself and everything else that has made him like this, because in the past Jack would have been right there, teasing smile tugging at his lips even if he did blush at the same time. And he finds himself hesitating when he reaches for Jack, but the blond lets himself be pulled in willingly enough, completely pliant in Gabriel’s hands as he arranges him so that he’s laid across his lap, cushioning his head on a pillow.

“Gabe…?” There’s a hint of confusion in Jack’s voice as he tilts his head to peer up at Gabriel, no doubt having expected a less comfortable position.

“Trust me…”

“Always.” The breathed word makes Gabriel freeze for a moment, his breath catching at how easily it had come, and the sheer certainty it contained. _Jack_ … It was only now that he had the assurance that Jack still trusted him that he realised he had been doubting it, but been too afraid to ask, and he had to close his eyes for a minute, suddenly overwhelmed. “Gabe…”

   Taking a deep breath Gabriel reopened his eyes, managing a soft smile as he caught the glimmer of concern in the blue eyes watching him, letting his hand trail down Jack’s back before coming to rest against the soft swell of his ass and feeling the tremor that greets his touch.

“Are you sure about this?” A tiny, fervent nod greets the question and he feels another tremor wrack the younger man. “Safe words?”

“Y-yellow and red.”

   Gabriel nodded, pleased that he wasn’t too close to the edge to have forgotten that, patting him lightly in praise before taking a deep breath. When he had first heard Jack’s request for his worst his mind had jumped to the belt they had used before, and the paddle they had bought but never got around to using, but that wasn’t what he wanted, and he had a feeling that it wasn’t what Jack wanted, and the shiver that met the gentle, testing swat he gave Jack’s rear reassured him that he was on the right track. SEP was good for something though, because he knew that he had the strength to give Jack what he wanted with his own hands and this time he was the one to shiver and he had to breathe deeply again to steady himself, before adopting a determined expression.

“I want you to count my hits. Let’s see how many you can take.” He waited until he received a nod before lifting his hand and letting it fly, he deliberately made the first one light, wanting to get the feel of it again and testing the waters. Jack jolted at the contact, a low noise slipping out before he remembered the order he had just agreed to.

“One…”

   Gabriel hummed his approval, letting his hand fly again, this time putting a little more strength behind the smack and Jack’s skin pinked under the impact, the blond gasping, hands clutching at the pillow beneath his head.

“Two…Gabe, please…more.”

   That was the signal Gabriel had been waiting for, and his response came in the form of another smack, this one carrying as much of his enhanced strength as he would allow himself to use against Jack. The response was instantaneous, Jack arching up in his lap with a cry, his breathing ragged when he manages to count the hit. Gabriel doesn’t let up, only pausing long enough to hear Jack count the smacks before letting fly again. And soon enough his world narrowed down to the sound of his hand against flesh, Jack’s cries and whimpers and stuttering voice. His body was heating up in response, although his focus remained on Jack, monitoring his reactions, waiting for the words that would stop it, or for a sign that Jack was ready to crack.

“Gabe…please… "

“Do you want more?” Gabriel deliberately deepened his voice, hearing the plea in the words, knowing what he wanted but still waiting for acknowledgement. He had been waiting for this, waiting for the spanking to no longer be enough on its own, and the tiny nod gave him permission. “This is punishment Jack…punishment for pushing me away.” His hand struck Jack’s ass with bruising force, and the blond let out a shivering cry, barely managing to choke out the number and this time Gabriel could feel the hardness pressing into his lap. “Punishment for taking a job that should never have been yours.” _Or mine_ … he finds himself thinking, wavering for a moment before the next smack, startled to hear Jack choke out.

“Sixteen…”

   _We’ve already gone that far…?_ In the past ten strikes at full force had been enough to do it, but then again Jack had never been wound this tightly before. Still Gabriel was reluctant to push too far, Ana’s warning still ringing in the back of his mind. _Four more, I have to do this in four more_ … His breathing was ragged now as he gathered himself, lifting his hand, letting his mind focus on the strain he’d seen in Jack’s expression, the shadows in his eyes…all things that he had the power to drive out if he played his role correctly.

“Punishment for wearing a mask,” he growled as he let fly, hearing a different note in Jack’s voice this time as the younger man cried out, arching with the pain and whimpering out the number and he gave him no time to recover. “Punishment for pushing yourself to the edge.” _Smack…”_ Punishment for…”

   It started with a single, solitary tear working its way down his cheek, cool against his feverish skin and Jack immediately squeezed his eyes shut _. Smack…_ This was what he wanted, this release. This feeling of being small and insignificant, of being weak and completely at someone’s mercy, no not someone’s… Gabriel’s…it could only ever be Gabriel. He was the only one that Jack could allow to see him like this, and it had been too long, far too long since they had been like this, and too much had built up. And suddenly he was sobbing, terrified that their time apart would leave Gabriel disgusted at the sight of him like this, and he buried his face into the pillow, gasping as another smack hit him, but unable to gasp out the number this time because he was shattering, falling apart just as he had wanted and it was all too much, too much pain, too much hurt and he lifted his head to gasp the safe word.

“Ye…”

   He couldn’t even get the word all the way out, feeling himself coming as Gabriel’s fingers brushed his sore ass as he pulled out of the final smack in response to the broken cry. and he shuddered as his sobs increased. The pleasure tingling beneath lost in the rush of emotions, he felt tiny and pathetic and he wanted to hide, burying his face back into the pillow.

“Jack?” Gabriel called softly, feeling the sobs wracking Jack’s body. “Come here,” Gabriel was gentle as he shifted Jack so that he was laid next to him, noting the mess beneath him but ignoring it as he pulled Jack into his side, reaching out to tug the covers over them as best as he could. Jack was still sobbing, his face now hidden against Gabriel, and Gabriel began to murmur soothing words in his ears as he curled his arms around him, rubbing a hand over shivering arms and kissing his shoulder. “Jack? Was it too much?” He asked anxiously when minutes passed without any sign of Jack calming, and he was only mildly relieved when Jack shook his head.

“Don’t hate me,” Jack finally blurted out.

“Jack…”

“I c-can’t…” Jack was shivering, trembling now even as he clutched at Gabriel. “It’s too much…. Overwatch…the UN…the public. They all want something from me, they all have an image of who I’m supposed to be…who they want me to be.” The words wouldn’t stop now that he had finally let them out, his voice ragged with tears, face still hidden from Gabriel as he added with desperation. “I can’t do that, I can’t handle it on my own…I need this…I need you… just please, don’t hate me for it…”

   Gabriel’s eyes softened, heart aching at the words. The whole point of this had been to tear down the barriers that Jack had erected around himself, he just hadn’t realised how much they were holding back, or what they were holding back. The aching in his chest deepening as he realised that some of that fear was because Gabriel had been pulling away, had been acting as though he was at least irritated with Jack for the promotion if not outright hating him for it and he closed his eyes. Jack… His own eyes were stinging when he leant down to press a gentle kiss into sweaty, blond hair.

“I don’t hate you…I’ve never hated you, how could I?”

“But…”

“I don’t hate you,” Gabriel reiterated, reaching down and gently nudging at Jack until the younger man finally lifted his head to look at him, eyes red and tears still rolling down his cheeks _. It could break him…_ It hurt to see him like this, and his fingers trembled as he tried to wipe away some of the tears. “I was angry and jealous, but I never hated you.” Jack sniffled, blinking as he slowly startled to settle, and Gabriel let his fingers rest against his cheeks as he added softly. “I’m so sorry Jack, I shouldn’t have left you alone.”

“I m-missed you…” Jack’s voice was wrecked, trembling, but lighter than it had been, and Gabriel smiled at having his earlier words turned back on him, leaning down to kiss Jack on the forehead.

“Me too….”


End file.
